Roger Stone’s To-Do List

  1. Get top hats added to the official prison uniform.
  2. Renew friendship with Paul Manafort.
  3. Publish cellmate’s pornographic emails.
  4. Get a prison tattoo of Trump’s face on my chest and freshen up Nixon tattoo on my back.
  5. Declare myself a hydra.
  6. Open a tailoring business for bespoke orange jumpsuits.
  7. Deny having anything to do with the release of cellmate’s pornographic emails.
  8. Threaten a fellow inmate with certain death and then pontificate for 45 minutes about how all death is certain.
  9. Take credit for deadly shiv attack at another prison.
  10. Become the biggest and baddest dirty trickster on the whole damn cellblock.

Tiffany Quay Tyson
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Tiffany Quay Tyson