Well, That Was Helpful

Did you watch the first presidential debate? Wasn’t it great to see two candidates discussing the issues in a thoughtful way? I really liked it when the one guy disagreed with the other guy, but in a super polite way so we could see how much respect these guys have for one another and for our country. And the part where they talked about their kids was really heartwarming. It was nice to see the one guy ask the other guy about his sons. In that moment, I felt like they were both just devoted fathers having a warm chat about their families.

Granted, things got a little contentious when the third guy asked about that section of the country that’s on fire. But, I mean, it’s fire. It’s a hot topic! (Sorry, I couldn’t help myself!) Anyway, thank goodness the one guy pointed out that the forest is full of trees, which, fun fact, are basically just kindling. I mean, of course they keep catching fire! All we need to do is get rid of the trees and problem solved. Except, I admit, I got a little confused when the same guy bragged about planting a billion trees and then went on for some time about utopian-like forest cities. Bit of a mixed message, dude.

This sort of respectful finger pointing was just one bright spot of many!

The best part, in my opinion, was how passionate the one guy was. He was so eager to share his views with America that he kept stepping on the other guy’s answers, ha ha! Even though it was sometimes difficult to understand what anyone was saying, I didn’t mind because I could see the enthusiasm and that’s the only thing that really matters. I think we can all agree that the person who talks the loudest cares the most. Also, that one guy’s face turned purple, so you know he really, really meant every word he said. That’s important to me.

And I really appreciated how that guy told us he had all the answers on health care, but didn’t get bogged down with specifics. I hate it when anyone tries to tell me how something is going to work. Just make it work, amirite? I’m probably too stupid to understand all the fine details of whether I’ll be able to afford to see a doctor in the next decade. Ditto for that vaccine. It’s enough for me to know that it’s coming really soon. I don’t need a bunch of facts and studies to bog down the process. God knows, I’m not smart enough to understand science! Thank you, guy, for keeping it simple.

Did you catch that bit about “proud boys”? It was so quick, you might have missed it. In fact, it was almost like that guy wanted us to miss it, like he was speaking only to a small number of people and the rest of us should just not worry about it. I think it’s really nice that he has such intimate rapport with some of his fans. Pride is so important, especially when it comes to boys. Also, wasn’t it great that he refused to denounce anyone? Inclusivity is a core value and he really demonstrated his commitment to it.

If I have one criticism, it’s about that third guy. I’m just not sure we needed him there, you know? I mean the first two guys seem perfectly capable of having a reasoned discussion without that guy interrupting all the time and asking so many questions. Maybe it’s just me, but it kind of felt like that guy at the table didn’t have enough to do. But I’m nitpicking. That’s how great it was! I have to look really hard to find something to criticize.

The one thing I’m absolutely sure about, is that it was a great debate with a lot of tremendous insights from those guys on stage, which absolutely, positively wouldn’t have happened if either of those guys had been a woman. I mean, whew! Think about how close we came to having a woman up there. I don’t know any woman who could match the tone of these guys and I’m just not sure a woman would be able to talk about the issues with such depth and thoughtfulness.

Anyhoo, what matters is that we have two guys running to be the next president of the United States and it’s so nice that we got to hear from them both this week and we’ll get to hear from them again over the next few weeks. I look forward to learning a lot!

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2 thoughts on “Well, That Was Helpful”

  1. Tiffany, thanks for an entertaining, satirical interpretation of a disastrous debate (debacle). You caught the flavor of a superficial thinker and expressed it in words and imagination superbly.

  2. Tiffany, you are a breath of fresh air. And you have an amazing capacity for emotional restraint that I would love to emulate – but can’t. I’ve been freaking out for four years now and still haven’t learned about breathing exercises…

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