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Category: Feminism

It’s Never Just a Joke

It’s Never Just a Joke

To dismiss is the point of such remarks. It’s a way of saying that women are less valuable and less interesting and less intelligent and less complicated than men. It’s a way of saying that women are less.

Please, Don’t Feed the Bully

Please, Don’t Feed the Bully

Bullies are insecure jerks. You know this if you managed to survive your junior high and high school years. Bullies attack because they fear being attacked. Bullies point out perceived flaws in others to deflect examination of their own shortcomings. The best way to deal with a bully is usually to ignore him. It’s easier said than done. Take the bully-in-chief, who delights in slinging adolescent insults. Horse face, dog, fat pig, slob—and these are just a few of the…

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Virginity Is Not Morality

Virginity Is Not Morality

I don’t know what will happen to Brett Kavanaugh over the next few days. The Supreme Court nominee continues to vigorously deny accusations that he sexually assaulted one woman and exposed himself to another while he was in high school and college. It’s possible that he could be confirmed to the court as early as the end of this week. The senators in charge of his confirmation do not seem inclined to investigate the allegations with any vigor and I…

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We Can All Do Better

We Can All Do Better

I believe Christine Blasey Ford I was a teenager in the 1980s. Back then, girls were taught to fight off the advances of boys. Boys were taught to advance. Boys seemed to believe that it was their right to try and have sex with girls. They didn’t pursue this by having conversations or by building intimacy; they pursued sex by wearing you down, by pressing against you, by grabbing and groping, by begging and even crying. No one talked about…

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The Joy of Happy Valley

The Joy of Happy Valley

When my husband travels, I often dive into a new series to pass the time in the evenings. He’s taken two extended trips this year, which was just enough for me to get through both seasons of Happy Valley on Netflix. If you haven’t seen Happy Valley, you should watch it. In Happy Valley, middle-aged women are portrayed by actual middle-aged women. This should not be remarkable, but it is. Of course, it’s British; American television would never stand for so…

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Twenty Men Who Should Never Have Guns

Twenty Men Who Should Never Have Guns

Any man who has ever hit a woman or romantic partner. Any man who has ever threatened to hit a woman or romantic partner. Any man who has ever continued to pursue a woman after being told she wasn’t interested. Any man who has ever called a woman “a stupid bitch” or some equivalent insult. Any man who has ever said to a woman, “you’d be pretty if you’d just smile/lose weight/wear makeup/wear a dress.” Any man who considers the…

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The C-Word

The C-Word

In the first chapter of my first novel, the main character uses the c-word to insult another woman who is behaving badly. You know the word I mean. It’s a vulgar term for vagina and it’s considered one of the harshest words you can use when insulting a woman. It’s so bad that it’s never co-opted to insult men. You might call a man a pussy, but you wouldn’t call him the c-word. That word is reserved for the truly…

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